Knowing Good and Evil

I’m going to confess something:  I have a tendency to overdo it when it comes to researching and gaining knowledge.   The other day, one of my dearest and closest friends said something that sparked my thought process.   After having yet another run-in with a spiraling anxiety cycle, she gently told me, “You have a very strong mind”.   I responded by countering, saying that I thought it was quite weak, given that I am inclined to chase rabbit trails like I’m playing whack-a-mole.   Nonetheless, her words lingered in my mind the rest of the day and into the next.    

As the thoughts rumbled through my mind, I found myself still disagreeing with her.   My mind is not “strong”.   It’s creative and inquisitive, but it isn’t immune to the traps of overthinking.    In moments of anxiety, my mind can come up with every horrific scenario known to man.  It creates things to be afraid of and the “what ifs” and “whys” never seem to end.   This is the negative side of things.  

As I continued to wrestle with these thoughts, I couldn’t help but wonder why I have such a deep yearning for knowledge, especially when it often leads to spiraling anxiety. This question brought me back to a passage in Scripture that offered some clarity.

“The Lord God commanded the man, saying, ‘From any tree of the garden you may freely eat;  but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for on the day that you eat from it you will certainly die.’”

That’s what came to my mind.   And then… the wheels really started rolling.   What does the knowledge of good and evil mean?   What would it feel like to never “know” evil?   Is knowledge inherently a good or a bad thing?   And on and on the questions flowed.  

What does the knowledge of good and evil mean?   What would it feel like to never “know” evil?   Is knowledge inherently a good or a bad thing?

For me, the insatiable desire to “know” hasn’t led to peace.   Instead, it only fuels more anxiety, more horrible scenarios, and more questions, keeping me languishing in turmoil.   As Ecclesiastes 3:18 says:

For with much wisdom comes much sorrow; the more knowledge, the more grief.   Ecclesiastes 3:18

I couldn’t relate to this verse more if I had written it myself.   The more I know, the more creative my mind becomes in manufacturing unspeakable possibilities.  Right now, my natural inclinations towards creativity and inquisitiveness are inciting fear, uncertainty, and loss of joy in my heart.  But “What if” this was flopped on its head and I used these traits for the glory of God, and for my good?   After all, God uses all things for the good of those who love Him.   Romans 8:28

Now, consider this:

"Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom" (2 Corinthians 3:17). 

The key to this flip-flop will not be found in doing more research or gaining more knowledge, rather freedom is found in Christ alone.   The simple fact of the matter is, we can’t know everything.   We weren’t built for that.   It’s not for us to know and understand all things. 

The simple fact of the matter is, we can’t know everything.   We weren’t built for that.

Are you questioning me yet?   Let me give you something to ponder.   Jesus, while on earth, did not know the time of His return.   Surely, we aren’t privy to more information than He is, are we?  So, just like Adam and Eve, we are to base our lives not on what we know, but on what God says.

Like Adam and Eve, we are to base our lives not on what we know, but on what God says.

As a side note, I don’t think it is wrong to ask questions of God.  But we shouldn’t assume that God owes us any sort of explanation.  And I suspect, if you’re anything like me, our thinking is just too simplistic for us to fully understand the grandeur of God’s plan, or His “why”.    

Think About It

How can you differentiate between the pursuit of knowledge that leads to peace versus one that leads to turmoil?

What does the idea of "freedom in Christ" mean to you in the context of seeking knowledge, and how does it contrast with the pressure to understand everything or have all the answers?

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In this blog, I hope you'll join me on my quiet adventures—simple walks and conversations with God, away from the hustle and bustle.

In the meantime, don't forget to check out Liz Trickey's blog, "God of My Depths," and Pearlene Richardson's blog, "Measurable Growth," for more insight into how nature reveals God's character in and to us.